Be Good to Yourself

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I will admit it! I am my own worse critic. I absolutely despise my legs, my arms are a close second and then I’ve got the good ole waddle chin.

It’s absolutely horrible how us women pick ourselves totally apart and give ourselves negative feedback everytime we look in a mirror. I am guilty as the day is long and that has got to change.

Every day I need to name one thing I love about myself. No, its not out of conceit but it has to come from self worth. We are all worthy to be loved by the one person we are meanest to and that is our own self.

So today I stand strong and say, I love my smile. My smile is mine, I’ve had it all my life and I love to make others smile by smiling at them.

Each day I promise to do my best to love myself for who I am on the inside while working on becoming healthier on the outside.

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A kick in the Gut and a Huge Eye Opener

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Yesterday while enjoying a great day with my daughter Kayla, grand daughter Josie and best friend Melinda, something happened at Dollywood that I had prayed would never happen again. Something that happened to me 5 years ago that for me motivated me to move forward in losing weight and becoming in shape and healthy. Yesterday as Kayla and I were boarding the Wild Eagle Roller Coaster, a coaster I’ve ridden several several times since it was built, I was unable to buckle my seat with ease on my own. A task that was always so easy was something I couldn’t do any longer.

I’ve gained 40lbs back of the 93lb that I lost and I’ve lost who I am and what I am worthy of along the way.

Yes my thyroid level being screwed up for 15 months helped with the weight gain but my lack of being motivated to exercise is the other reason. I’ve gotten lazy with exercise and yesterday with tears in my eyes and embarrassment on my face I rode the Wild Eagle for the last time as a person who is obese.

Today a new journey begins. Inhale the present, Exhale the past. Its all about me and thats just the way it’s going to be. I’ve got to do this. I’ve got to find myself, love myself and enjoy the journey. I’m so worth the fight it’s going to take but I’m willing to take on this battle and come out victorious!

Be Happy With You

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In a world where everyone is so body conscience and there is so much body shaming I wanted to share with you the last 5 years of my journey. My highest weight was 277lbs. I was told by my doctor that I was the healthiest morbidly obese person he had seen. 😨 Really? How is someone who is morbidly obese healthy? 

At my lowest weight on the bottom left picture I weighed 182 lbs and I felt amazing. I was the happiest I had been in years. The picture which shows me at the strongest I weighed about 187. I was lean and had placed muscle where fat used to be. (I was trying to look like a warrior)… Lol I was VERY excited with this look but to me it still wasn’t good enough. I kept picking myself apart.

Fast forward to today 2015. Over the past year my body has gone thru so much. Thyroid levels out of whack, cortisol is out of whack and I’ve gained 35 lbs of which 25 of that had been in this past year. I’ve also learned that I’m allergic to everything outside in Tennessee where I live which has kept me sick. I’m still looking for a job which is added stress and on top of that I was not allowed to work out for 3 months. My food has been worse then it’s been in a long time but guess what… I’M BACK! I’ve been released to exercise, taking it slow of course. I’m journaling like a crazy woman but that’s what works for me.

I’ve done my fair share of body shaming myself and there is no excuse for it. I am human and life happens. Body shaming does nothing but make us worse and it makes us a victim at our own hands. We hurt ourselves when we body shame ourselves.

Yes I look at where I was when I started 5 years ago and I’m not at that place. Yes I look at where I was at my leanest and strongest and I’m not there either. I look at me today and I’m thankful and blessed that I’m still here. I’m still alive and still able to be on this journey in life. It reminds me that hard work pays off. It reminds me that all of this was done without the use of any pills, powders, wraps or magic potion. I am capable of getting lean and healthy and loving myself along the way. I will work on being the best version of me every single day all the while remembering I Am Worth It, I Am Worth It, I Am Worth It!

Instead of body shaming I will tell myself one thing positive about myself every single day and I invite you to do the same. Today my positive is this: My smile, I think my smile is nice😁. Now it’s your turn.

Be True to You and Your Journey

I’m probably going to lose some followers or make some folks mad but here goes.

Quit grasping at anything and everything to lose weight fast. All of these diet gimmicks that are out there set so many up for failure by making false promises and take your money.  Sure you lose weight fast but is it sustainable. NO it is not. The only true way of sustainable weight loss and healthy living is to eat clean, exercise, get adequate sleep and love yourself. It truly is a lifestyle change. If you can stay on your program for a lifetime then good. If it’s a 3 day diet then that should be your answer and show you it’s not for a lifetime. 

Be honest with yourself and realize that change is hard. Sometimes taking a long hard look in the mirror and realizing that yo yo dieting and fads are not the answer. Being true to yourself is

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priority, if you can’t be true to you and the changes that need to take place then success is going to be so very hard.

Life Is A Journey

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Sometimes in life we feel that we need to have total control of everything.  Sadly, we can’t.  Life is full of so many detours, twist and turns and we have no control at times of what lies ahead. All we can do is trust, have faith, strength and believe that we will make it through the tough times.

Always remember “You Can Do Anything, But Not Everything”

Death of a Hero

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It is still so hard to believe that this amazing man is gone!

June 16, 1984 this man and his family came into my life.  I met his son Eric on a blind date and was also introduced to his parents Jerre and Carolyn Guthrie.  I fell in love with this family immediately.  In October of 1984 I learned I was pregnant with my now 30 year old son Andrew.  NEVER ONCE did Jerre or Carolyn make me feel bad nor did they ever make it out that getting pregnant was all my fault.  Instead, they opened up their lives and their home to me.  Whatever I needed they were always there to support me.  They were there then and 30 years later things have not changed….they have always stayed in my life.  Jerre performed the wedding ceremony of myself and his son Eric in April of 1987 and he was there for the birth of our daughter Kayla in August of 1989.

In 1990 I was diagnosed with cancer and once again he and Carolyn were both there to step in and help whenever possible.  Jerre, in my opinion, was a true Angel on this Earth!!  He never judged and always loved me.  He always made me feel like his daughter and nothing less.  He continued loving me thru some very, very difficult times in my life.

He baptized me at the age of 17 and baptized my son Andrew when he was 13 and daughter Kayla at the age of 10…..this was such a great experience and will always hold dear to me.

April 23, 2015 the devastating news and one of the worse heartaches I have faced happened….Jerre passed away at home while doing what he loved….working in his yard doing one of his many projects.  He had a massive heart attack and did not suffer.  His last words were “Honey” when he looked at Carolyn who was pruning her flowers. That was him telling her I love you in my opinion because this man adored his wife.  On April 26, 2015 we had the memorial service and it was such a hard time.  So many memories that flood my mind along with tears of sadness for losing such an amazing man, husband, father, father in law, uncle, brother, grand father and great grandfather.  He meant the world to us all and he will be missed so much.  He is our missing link in the family but we will all link together again some day.

Jerre Wayne Guthrie you may be gone from your Earthly home but you are never gone from my heart.  A true hero!  I love you, Andi

Don’t Stop Believing

Today, February 23, 2015 starts a new journey that I am starting.  As a lot of you know I have been having severe stomach issues, some caused by being Gluten intolerant, some food issues there are no reasoning behind my intolerance and the rest is caused from stress. 

Alot of people have said “Get rid of the stress in your life and you will remedy your stomach problems.” My answer to that is this…. If getting rid of the stress was that easy I would have done that a very long time ago.  I would have said “poof, stress be gone. ” Sadly though, in the REAL WORLD, it just doesn’t work like that, trust me I have tried.

I have been given a great gift to help me with my stomach issues and that gift was a 30 day program with ISOGENIX.  I’ve also been given a gift of a 30 Day membership to Fort Sanders Health and Fitness Center.  These two gifts combined are going to work together to help me work on destressing and getting my health and stomach issues in check.  I believe it will help with my stress as well because it puts alot of the guessing work out of figuring out my foods because I am drinking meal replacement shakes 2 times a day and consuming 1000 calories of whole foods a day between my snacks and my 1 meal.  I am cleaning all the toxins out of my body with Isogenix and going to be slowly reintroducing foods after my 30 days on this system to see exactly what it is that I need to stay away from.

I am excited, to say the least, about this amazing opportunity and can’t wait to feel ALIVE and WELL and HUMAN again.  I love the gym feel and have missed being in a gym atmosphere.  Yes, I have all of the equipment I need in my garage but it’s cold, too cold, for me to be out there and to be honest I don’t want any distractions.  I deserve to 100% concentrate on me and my health.

I will be blogging over the next 30 days about my journey and hope you will follow along. I will never stop believing that my life is meant to be nothing but great!  DON’T STOP BELIEVING, YOU ARE WORTH IT!

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